Here's the only thing you actually need to know about advertising with Free African Media: around here you'll never have to compete with anybody else to reach our awesome audience. Where's the catch? We're glad you asked. But let's talk about value before we start scaring you away.
Free African Media is ideal for you because we have the highest class of reader you can imagine. Not all of them are filthy rich and not all of them are decision-makers who shift huge budgets (although many, many of them are these things), but all of them are smart and all of them are influential in some sphere. If they're not directly crucial to your business, then they have a great indirect influence through the people who trust them.
Now when you are dealing with a readership as powerful as that, and advertisers as awesome as you (nice haircut, by the way), you've got to show some respect. Chasing hits is disrespectful. It is cheap and easy to publish endless reams of wire copy or nonsensical blog posts, and inevitably some poor soul will click on a link and add to your counter so we can bill you for that click. We get money, but both you and the reader are unhappy. And the only thing we like less than an unhappy advertiser is an unhappy reader.
We could offer you a ration of hits, but we won't. We could offer an advertising slot that is one of twenty on the same page, but we won't. What we do offer is mediated access to this fantastic audience in the perfect environment. At Free African Media there is one, and only one, advertisement per page – yours. You are the sovereign ruler of all advertising on that page.
The price at which you get this amazing offer is so low that our accountants cry themselves to sleep every night. We think that's because even an accountant can see the value of the unique opportunity our advertising slots offer. For the first time, you can now use pure brand messaging online. These ads are B.I.G big; it would take a severely stunted mind to miss them. Yet – and this is crucial – they don't annoy the reader.
Now, back to that catch. In a nutshell, you don't get to mess with our readers and you don't get to piss them off. We won't offer you interrupt advertising or floaters or bouncers or anything that impinges on their enjoyment of the site. That includes strobe lights flashing in their faces, annoying embedded sounds, and all the rest.
There are two reasons we're strict about this.
One, you really don't need any of that stuff here. In other online environments, advertisements have to act like annoyed brats throwing tantrums in order to be heard above the clamour. But in the rather more refined environment of Free African Media there is no need to shout, because nobody else is talking when you are.
Two, none of us can afford to piss off our readers. You may pay our bills, and we're grateful and all, but these are not the kind of people you mess with.
If you're convinced now, we'd be glad to hear from you. Drop a line to email@example.com and somebody will get right back to you, or contact our Minister of Foreign Affairs, Styli Charlambous, on 083 379 5949.
If we haven't quite convinced you and you'd like to talk about it, then we'll appreciate your call all the more.